Stupid Cancer Returns but Will NOT win!

Since November 1^st I started to get a lot of abdominal pain that continued to get worse throughout the month. I was even really focusing on eating clean at the time and to prepare to be strong through the holidays. I started getting sudden spasms in my bowels that were sharp and severe. I noticed that the pain kept getting worse and noticed that every time I ate the spasms would be more severe.  Finally on Thanksgiving at my parents I decided I would just a small amount of food and by the middle of the night I was in agony. I was in severe pain and couldn’t move and was seriously considering going to the ER because of the pain. 

After that I decided that I would only do liquids and drank lots of green juice and water. The pain kind of decreased but was still there. Pepto was the only thing that took the edge off the pain. I even got so desperate for rest that I took Ativan a few nights to knock me out which did help.  I researched more to find out what could possibly going on since my last CT scan showed a slight increase in tumor size on the ascending colon. I ran into dx such as IBS which was the closest thing that my symptoms matched. I soon learned about changing what I ate to follow a Low FODMAP diet. This was very restricting but if I stuck to it for a good week, my pains were not as severe. I finally got so tired of the pain that I contacted both oncologists for help. Another repeat CT scan was done at the end of November with nothing new found. Early December, Dr. Zempolich wanted to rule out any upper GI problems and so I had an endoscopy. The only thing I was dx with was Baretts Esophogus which is basically GERD and had a lot of bleeding in my esophagus. But that didn’t explain the lower GI pain I have still been experiencing. Dr. Zempolich suggested that this is the best time to go in and do an exploratory abdominal surgery to see what was going on and to do a bowel resection where I had a visible tumor. I was not expecting her to say that I would be having surgery next week on December 12. 

  This was not expected as I feel like I am just recovered from the one I had in April. I have worked my butt off to return to the gym and regain the strength, endurance and health to continue to take care of me.  I have struggled the past 4 1/2 years  while being on oral chemo daily, having chemo injections in my hips every few weeks, working to build up my practice of hand therapy, being a supportive and loving mom and spending every ounce of extra energy to go to the gym to re-build my strength and core. 

I went in for a planned exploratory abdominal surgery to remove a small tumor on my bowel on Dec 12^th. My normal 6-10 hour surgery ended unexpectedly at little over 2 hours. Dr. Zempolich opened me up with a vertical incision from chest to pelvis (for the 6^th time) and quickly found that my abdomen was coated in thousands of cancerous tumors. There was too much cancer to even remove at the time of surgery. My doctor told me that I should go home and enjoy what will most likely be my last Christmas. I stayed in the hospital for 4 days and returned to my parent’s house for them to take care of me.

While in the hospital I spoke with Dr. Werner regarding her thoughts and the next steps to take. We discussed HIPEC chemo but results have been seen only in high grade cancer. The better option was to start chemotherapy again with a new medication Doxil, given the nick name of “The Red Devil” along with carboplatin.  I am starting this chemo on the 30^th of December and nervous to go through this again. Last time I had chemo, it took my very close to my death bed and knowing that this process will be challenging again.  I am so grateful to have met with Huntsman’s palliative care program yesterday. This gives me confidence and introduced me to a new support team to aide me in getting through the continued pain and struggle of day to day functions that this return of cancer has caused. 

 Pre Surgery: 

I returned to my own home after 3 days being at my parents. In the middle of the night I woke up with the most peaceful feeling and amazement of how quick my incision was healing. It had only been 1 week after surgery and my incision was almost entirely healed and I could even lay on my stomach. I know without a doubt that the many prayers said on my behalf have helped me to heal this quickly. Unfortunately, Thursday night (1 week since surgery), I began to start having the abdominal spasms and growling stomach. I forgot how nice it felt to just have surgical pain. Now I know that this bowel pain is from all the cancer inside my abdomen and bowels holding the tissues tightly wrapped around my insides which is causing all the pain. I am still trying to figure out if certain foods cause more pain. It is so frustrating after not being able to eat since November and then right after surgery being restricted to a soft foods diet. I have only been able to tolerate rice, malt-o-meal, eggs, and my protein shake prior to the pain returning. The only thing I ate the day the pain started up again was egg drop soup and lo mein noodles and rice. It is frustrating to be hungry, yet so afraid to eat because of the pain I know I experience, even with increasing my dosage of cramping medicine.